The College Essay Lab

Last Wednesday, a parent asked a college essay question during a seminar I conducted in our new satellite office in cloudy, rainy Boca Raton:

"How can my kid write anything original?"

Common question.  But the wrong question.

Your goal is not "original."  

It can't possibly be, when you consider that the typical admissions officer reviews 1,000 applications per cycle, and has worked in admissions three, five or more years in many cases.

You're unlikely to come up with something she's never seen before.  But don't worry about it.

Instead of original, focus on "interesting."

The vast majority of essays commit one deadly, unforgivable sin:

They're BORING.

My advice is to look at the act of applying to college as a MARKETING exercise.

A good marketer cuts through the clutter and makes a persuasive case why his audience should want or need his product.

How is that different from the college application process?

Here's what I told a student the other day:...

Print Scholarships on Demand Webinar

If you think your kid's colleges are going to give him or her their highest and best offer out of the gate, you might be in for a rude surprise.

Each year, thousands of parents optimistically open their kids' financial aid and scholarship offers, only to be slapped in the face by the harsh reality of insanely high tuition, but with hardly anything in aid.

Or nothing at all.

Like our client for several years, Fiona. (Not her real name.)

This past August, when Fiona (still not her real name) received the award for her son, a rising junior at an elite, urban Ivy League school, she thought there was a mistake.

In numerical terms, here's what they offered:

BUPKIS.

Fiona was miffed because, two years earlier, her son had received a fairly generous award. But not now.

Fiona got on the phone with us, namely Pearl, who files financial aid applications for 400+ of our clients annually.

"What happened? Why did they give us nothing this year?"

Pea...

UnCommon Application Webinar

Every year in College Application Land, there are shocking and salacious stories along the same themes:

She's valedictorian and didn't get into Princeton!  They hate our high school.

My son had great grades and near-perfect SATs, built homes for low income vacationers in Aruba and cured Covid.  He didn't get anywhere because he's white!

Didja hear about the kid who had a 30 million dollar business, a 4.0 and a 34 ACT, but got denied by 12 of 15 colleges!  

There's never ONE THING that gets an applicant accepted or denied by a college, as far as I'm concerned.

But one of the first places even Frank Drebin (Senior) would look for smoking gun clues is the essay, or personal statement.

It's not necessarily a case of "bad topic" - lessons grandpa taught me, the year I got cut from the team but made it next year and scored the winning goal in the state championship or other cliche topic.

It's usually more nuanced. It's about the message.  And tone.

Adm...

The 529 college savings account has many benefits, including tax-free growth.  Financial services companies introduced it to help parents and grandparents save for college, out of the goodness of their own hearts of course.

You can use 529 funds to pay for qualified expenses, including college tuition, high school tuition, room and board, even tutoring.  (That was self-serving.)

But here's the rarely disclosed, inconvenient truth about saving for college with a 529 account:

It reduces your eligibility for aid!

Yep. The 529 penalizes you in the financial aid formulas.  Which is a clue why responsible parents, who lived below their means, paid their bills and socked away money for college and other future goals, frequently feel sca-rooooood by the financial aid process.

Especially when less responsible families -- who bought/leased fancy-schmancy, late model imported cars, took multiple vacations to Aruba, Croatia and other hot spots, and maxed out their credit cards -- flat out  ...

Think you make too much for financial aid?  Most six and seven figure-earning families just blindly assume that they can't qualify for any type of financial assistance for college.

Think again.

The dirty little secret that colleges don't tell is that most scholarships and aid actually go to high-income families.

They’d rather avoid negative press for this non-politically correct reality. Can you imagine if word got out?

Actually, colleges would strongly prefer that you shut up and write the check.

Here's the simple truth that you won't hear at your high school's College Night (waste of time):

You don't have to pay "retail" for college, even if colleges consider you affluent.

This coming Monday, I'm running a new webinar, “How to Print Scholarships on Demand.”

You'll discover how to slash your tuition bill by 56% or more, even if you think you can't possibly qualify for any type of aid.

It's free and there's nothing to buy. (Obviously I teach these classes to help get the ...

Think you make too much for financial aid?  Most six and seven figure-earning families just blindly assume that they can't qualify for any type of financial assistance for college.

Think again.

The dirty little secret that colleges don't tell is that most scholarships and aid actually go to high-income families.

They’d rather avoid negative press for this non-politically correct reality. Can you imagine if word got out?

Actually, colleges would strongly prefer that you shut up and write the check.

Here's the simple truth that you won't hear at your high school's College Night (waste of time):

You don't have to pay "retail" for college, even if colleges consider you affluent.

This coming Monday, I'm running a new webinar, “How to Print Scholarships on Demand.”

You'll discover how to slash your tuition bill by 56% or more, even if you think you can't possibly qualify for any type of aid.

It's free and there's nothing to buy. (Obviously I teach these classes to help get the ...

Tonight, Wednesday, August 20, our head tutor Marissa U is conducting a brief walk-through of each part of the new ACT and recently updated SAT.

If you have a young test-taker slash college-bound kiddo, I wholeheartedly recommend that you attend this brief presentation.   Especially if you have questions like:

*What's the deal with the new digital ACT format?  Is the change good, bad or "other"? 

*Should my kid take the science section on the ACT?

*Which test -- SAT or ACT -- is better for weaker math students?

*Which test is better for slower test takers?

*More, including your questions in the Q&A

Here's how to login and join us tonight:

Get Started >>

- Andy "Testing, Testing" Lockwood

For Marissa U, Head Tutor

P.S.  Please share this with anyone who could use this info!

The ACT bid adieu to paper testing and now has embraced an all digital format.

Strangely, despite their Dumb Phone-addictive behaviors, many students preferred the analog, or paper version.

And of course many other kiddos are better suited for the SAT, in lieu of the ACT.

How to figure out Which Test is Best, for your young 'un?

This coming Wednesday, August 20, our head tutor is holding a brief walk-through of each part of the ACT and SAT.

"Riveting" is the first word that came to mind.

Although not Golden Globe-worthy, Wednesday's class will be much more valuable if you have a child about to grapple with the standardized tests, but you're a babe lost in the woods about where to start.

If that sounds like you, you won't want ot miss this free online class.

Here's where to get all details and sign up...

...and discover Which Test is Best for your child:

Get Started >>

- Andy "At the Movies" Lockwood

For Marissa U, Head Tutor

P.S.  Please share this with anyone wh...

Good morning!

We're hitting the airwaves this morning -- 10:00am EST --  for College Coffee Talk, our live show about college admissions and financial aid news that you can use!  

Here's what's on tap for today:

Confessions of a College Advisor -- "eavesdrop" on a conversation I had with a class of 2026 prospective client this weekend.  It was going along swimmingly...until it didn't.

Tune In!

Grab a cup of joe and we'll see you at 10am EST (recorded if you can't make it)

- Andy Lockwood

For 2026 families:

You're invited to a brand new webinar tomorrow night, How to Make Your Common Application Uncommonly Great.

August 1 marked the release of this year's "refreshed" Common App...

...but what I do not find refreshing are all of the god-awful admission-crushing mistakes that kids make each year, often egged on by Reddit, Tik Tok, other know-it-all parents or misguided, hapless guidance counselors.

Applying to college today is about how you market yourself, it's not a meritocracy.

How good is your guidance counselor at marketing?

I'll answer that one for you:  about as competent as your average DMV employee.  

I've been called a marketing consultant trapped in a college advisor's body.  Yeah, I know how creepy that is, but it's accurate.

I'm always thinking in New York Post-style headlines.  I can't help it, it's just the way I'm wired.

Here's  what I told a prospective client yesterday:  "You're not Madeline, random kid applying to colleges versus 50,000 ident...